Flower Bloomed in a Dark Room by Amani Fardan
Flower Bloomed in a Dark Room
Acrylic
I often think about this line from Kendrick Lamar's Poetic Justice: "If I told you that a flower bloomed in a dark room, would you trust it?" and I think about myself growing up, literally, in this dark environment. I wonder what this place does to the underdeveloped psyche. I wonder how messed up I am. Psychologist says there's nothing wrong with me, but these people don't care about me. So in the meantime, like the owl, I look, listen and learn everything I can to help me grow and develop, even though I'm trapped behind these bars.
Meet the artist: Amani Farden
Amani Fardan
Identity Statement
I've been locked up for so long now that I don't think I have an identity that isn't prison related/associated. I've been behind walls longer than I was alive out there, and I'm only 32. I was gone before Facebook came out. MySpace was still hot. I don't wanna say I'm institutionalized because I'd never feel more comfortable/prefer to be in here than free out there, but everything I've learned since the age of 15 has been in here. I don't know how to do anything. I never got a chance to get my license, get a job, vote, pay any bills or taxes. I'm a ghost out there. I know what I'm not, though - I'm not this Menace II Society or monster that I was portrayed when I first came down as a kid. I'm still a person, and my life shouldn't be forfeited for my actions at an age when I wasn't allowed to do anything adult-related because I was immature, irresponsible, impulsive and all of the other traits associated with juveniles.
What role does art play in your life?
Art enables me to express how I feel, create something for someone I care about, and possibly make some money, supplement my income of $.50 an hour. Plus, it keeps me busy and out of trouble. I owe a big thanks to the art program here at Stillwater. I wouldn't have been able to develop my skills as an artist it it weren't for the program and the space it provided.